My Grandpa Walker

Last night, as I lay in bed, I found myself thinking about my grandfather, Dale Walker.
I will admit that I do not think of him nearly enough.
Yesterday was the 18th anniversary of his death.
It doesn't feel like that long ago.
Except it was.

At the time I was still living at home, attending the community college and working at Subway. I think it is fairly safe to say that I was pretty self-absorbed at that point in my life - hopefully that is not still the case.

I cannot remember much about the weeks prior to his passing, but I have vivid memories of one of the last times I saw my grandfather alive. My mother decided to go to New Athens to help around the house, as Grandpa was basically bedridden. I decided to go along with her. I remember thinking that it was such a big ordeal to me, as I had to email my teachers that day to let them know I would not be attending class - as if they cared. Looking back on it now, that seems like such a trivial thing and worthless to worry about. Thankfully, I made the right decision and hopped in the conversion van for the hour and fifteen minute trip.

When we arrived, I help Grandpa get from the bedroom to his recliner by the front door. He settled in for a period of time and seemed very quiet. After a while, I helped him walk to the bathroom. Once he was finished, I helped him move to his bed. This was the last time I ever saw my grandfather standing. As he rested in his bed, I helped him get comfortable, helped get him a drink and spent the time talking to him about what mom was helping grandma with in the kitchen.

After a couple of hours, it became readily apparent that his condition was worsening. Uncle Keith had come over and we were going to get Grandpa into the Green Escort to take to the hospital. Not having a wheelchair in the house, we resorted to grabbing one of the wooden kitchen chairs from the kitchen. We set Grandpa into the chair and then we carried him out of the front door to the car. (My recollection is that I carried the feet of the chair, but that may be incorrect.) Once we were able to get Grandpa into the passenger side and buckled in, I leaned in, kissed his forehead and told my Grandfather that I loved him. I don't know that he had the power t
o respond vocally at that point (and I do not remember him saying anything to me in return), but I could see his response in his eyes. He loved us all.

I stepped back, watched the car leave the gravel driveway past the mailbox and turn the corner onto Hanft Street. I remember thinking that I might never see him again. I do not believe I ever did. I cannot tell you what day this all occurred on, as I cannot remember how long he was at the hospital. I do not believe it could have been too long. All I know is that this is my last memory of my Grandpa Walker, aside from his funeral.

Looking back, I am incredibly glad that I had the opportunity to help my

Grandfather that day. It's not something you think of ever doing as a grandchild, and it was nothing that I would have wanted to do if you had told me ahead of time what it would entail. Yet, in the moment, it was the natural thing to do, the right thing to do. I do not believe that i will never forget that day. I have forgotten some of the details. Perhaps time has altered my memory of the timing of that visit. However, I know without a doubt that my Grandfather knew that I loved him - as I had shown it in action and through my words. That's a very special thing for me to know without a doubt.

Thinking back, even now, I still feel like crying over the loss of my Grandfather.

He wasn't a giant of a man.
He was tall and thin.
He wasn't boisterous and loud.
He was a quiet man.
He loved gardening and didn't get too upset when we played in his corn.
He loved taking his grand-kids wagon rides behind his lawn tractor.
He kept the fridge in the garage stocked with Vess soda, because he loved his grand-kids.
He lived a fairly simple life and that was good enough.

It's hard to believe that I have now lived more than half of my life without Grandpa Walker in it.

I'd like to think that my love for Christmas time, Christmas lights and grilling comes, in some degree, from him.
I hope that he'd be happy with who I have become - I'd like to think so.

Grandpa Walker - you are loved and missed.

Thanksgiving Turkey Dance 2013

Ladies and gentlemen, I proudly present the 2013 rendition of the world famous Turkey Dance!




This is a Walker family tradition.
The routine varies slightly year to year and the turkey gets a little larger each year.
Happy Thanksgiving!

Ethanol and The Dust Bowl

Lisa and I recently watched the Ken Burns' documentary "The Dust Bowl". It was very interesting, very informative and very moving. The stories featured told of the causes of that environmental catastrophe, the impact of the event on the people in the area and the fragility of the land. It featured a lot from Timothy Eagan's wonderfully written book on the subject "The Worst Hard Time" - I highly recommend reading it.


Today I read this article "The Secret, Dirty Cost of Obama's Green Power Push" which details how the EPA, Department of Agriculture and the White House have pursued pushing ethanol as a sustainable biofuel, when the evidence is more and more to the contrary.

There are several things stated in the article that brought to mind the Dust Bowl, but this one really stood out to me:

Investors from as far away as Maryland and Pennsylvania have bought thousands of acres in Wayne County, sending prices skyrocketing from $350 per acre a decade ago to $5,000 today.

One in every four acres of in the county is now owned by an out-of-towner.
Those who still own land often rent it to farming companies offering $300 or more per acre. Perkins could make perhaps $27,000 a year if he let somebody plant corn on his land. That's nothing to dismiss in a county where typical household income is $36,000.
But he knows what that means. He sees the black streaks in his neighbor's cornfields, knowing the topsoil washes away with every rain. He doesn't want that for his family's land.

This is similar to what happened in the 1920s when the cost of grain skyrocketed and the government expanded homestead settlement programs. Investors from the big city or even out of state would purchase acreage or pay to farm someone's previously untouched existing acreage. The land hadn't previously been planted with crops because it was unsuitable for that type of farming. The huge increase in demand and price led to a boom of converting prairie land to farm land. Yet the fact remained, the newly converted land was historically known as not being suitable for crops. When the unusually wet years turned back to the normal dry years, the ground dried out and the soil began to erode and blow. When the drought of the 30s hit the former prairie lands, there was nothing to hold the soil down and it literally took off with the wind.

It would behoove us to learn from past mistakes and not farm land that is not meant to be farmed. It would be wise for our government to eliminate subsidies for programs that produce little benefit, encourage a misuse of the land and place us in a position that could lead to another environmental disaster.

In short, it would be beneficial for us as a country to learn from our own not-too-distant history.

It's Good to Give Thanks

Lydia Sings "It's Good to Give Thanks"

Lydia sang this song with her pre-school classmates to start Zion Lutheran's Saturday evening service tonight. Five years ago at basically the same time Lisa and I were eating mostaccioli at Sarah and Matt's house, watched Iron Man and drove the whole way home talking about how the baby inside was going crazy and flipping all around. We thought we might be headed to the hospital that night. Lisa had contractions basically all night and the next day we finally made our way to the hospital (via a trip to Sam's and then the doctor's office).

It is good to give thanks.
I am thankful to God for this wonderful little girl who is growing up so quickly...

Jar Jar Binks Dies

This is wonderful:


The original deleted scene can be viewed here.
The fan edited version above is much better.
(HT: 22words)

A Life Well Lived - Scarlett

This morning I stopped in to the visitation of a friend who passed away last week. I am thankful I found out it in time to attend as I saw many of her family, who are friends of mine as well, that I haven't seen in over 6 years. I visited with them briefly and answered questions about my family. In many ways it felt like a reunion of sorts, which I suppose is the way you might want a funeral to be. While there is definitely more than a hint of sorrow throughout the room, there was a kindness and love that was a great reflection of the friend we had all lost.

Scarlett O'Hara Matlock was 62 years old when she obtained her reward for a life well-lived for the glory of God. She had endured more pain and suffering than many people will ever have in their lifetime and she did it with a joy that was obviously not of this world. I saw her exhibit this joy in suffering many times. Scarlett always expressed her love for people without shame, hesitation or qualification. I was privileged enough to be able to help her move around from time to time by carrying her from her bed to a couch or chair. I was reminded today by her family of how I had helped her in this way. She was light and frail due to illness, yet full of life and a passion for God that was unmistakeable.

It's not that I had forgotten having carried her - it's just that I never attached any great amount of significance to it when I was doing it. It was something that needed to be done and I was capable of doing it, so I did it. And yet, years later, the family remembered and even introduced me as the man who carried Scarlett around the house. I am reminder that simple acts of kindness that don't cost you anything but time and a little bit of energy can mean so much more to people. I need to be cognizant of the opportunities I have presented to me to help other people.

I was told by her brother that some of Scarlett's last words were "God is Good, all the time."
Indeed He is. She was faithful to God and He is ever Faithful to her, and us.

I am thankful for having known Scarlett, as I would imagine everyone who ever met her would agree.
She made the world a brighter place - a more lovely place.I am thankful that there is no doubt that she is in the presence of God, where she most longed to be. Her suffering is over. Her joy is complete.

Oh, that my life would more closely resemble hers.

Lord help me learn to love others and endure hardship in a way that brings glory and praise to you.

Photos: Baby Boy Ultrasound at 37 weeks

With Lydia and Lainey, we never had an ultrasound this late in the pregnancy.
As Lisa said in the doctor's office, "It kind of feels like we are cheating" by getting to see him sooner.
Well, since we're going to be meeting this little guy sooner than later, I'd like to let you cheat as well.

Oh, and for those of you inquisitive types, he was estimated to be weighing 8lbs at this point and somewhere in the 39 week range - so he looks to be big and healthy.

Click on any image to see the larger size.

Update: For some reason, this post has been getting a bunch of views lately. For those of you who somehow found your way here - "Welcome!"  If you'd leave a comment as to what you were searching for that led you here, that would help ease my curiosity a bit. If you were looking for adorable pictures of my little boy at 37 weeks, then I guess you came to the right place. God is good and Marshall is still healthy and growing like a weed.   :)

Valentine's Day Recap

Valentine's Day has come and gone again.
Hopefully your day was better than this little guy's:


Our Valentine's Day was spent with me working, Lisa keeping the girls entertained with numerous Holiday activities and a night spent at home for all of us. We exchanged cards after dinner and just enjoyed being together. That seems appropriate for this day.

Stillness at the Super Bowl Half-Time Show

I found myself reflecting on the Super Bowl this morning and wondering when the Half-Time Show became a part of the entire event. Because I like to look into such things, here's a brief history of the event:

In 1993, the NFL decided it would, for the first time in its history, have only one person perform during the Half-Time show of the Super Bowl. Due to his increasing popularity around the world, they chose Michael Jackson. Little did they expect that, for the first time in the history of the game, the viewing audience would actually increase during the Half-Time show. This set a precedent that has been followed ever since, with each band or performer attempting to capture and draw in viewers during the game break.

I watched Michael Jackson's performance when it happened and I just watched it again:

There's so much that I could discuss about this performance, but I want to point out a few things that I find absolutely incredible about the opening 2 minutes.

- To start it off, Jackson does what, to my limited knowledge, had never been done before - utilizing the two mega screens as an integral part of his entrance.
- He used these two screens and two decoy performers to tease the crowd for the first 32 seconds of the show. Using the decoys at the opening only further built up the anticipation of his arrival and performance.
- Jackson is launched up through the smoke onto stage at the 34 second mark and adopts the "Dangerous" pose. There is no music. There is no light show. It is just him standing there. Jackson makes it a point to prove that he is the show. For an absolutely astonishing seventy-four seconds, Jackson does not move. He is still. The crowd grows anxious and I am certain that the organizers of the event were not feeling quite as confident in their choice at this point.
- Then he turns his head to the left in one quick motion. He holds this pose for sixteen seconds. That brings his total time on stage as a statue to exactly a minute and a half. Not a beat of music has played. Jackson hasn't said or sang a single word and yet the crowd is growing in its intensity.
-  Finally, at just over two minutes into the performance, the music starts and Jackson become animated. The crowd goes wild. Before he has even begun, Jackson has given the attendees a memorable experience.

For those of you who have never been on stage in front of a group of people (large or small), every second that goes by silently can seem like an eternity. To hold a pose for a few seconds can be a challenge. To let a line linger for a moment after it is spoken for effect takes a certain will that some people cannot master. How Jackson could stand as still as he did for as long as he did in that moment is totally beyond me. Here he was on the biggest stage in the world, in front of the largest crowd in the world, to perform a show that had been hyped through the media for months leading up to this moment, and he just stands there stiff as a board. I'm sure his adrenaline was cranked and that he was excited to deliver an amazing once-in-a-lifetime performance, but he chose to stand still to start it all off.

In today's environment, Jackson's stillness would have cost the broadcasters $15,000,000 in airtime. And yet, would the performance have been as memorable if he hadn't started it that way? I doubt it. The still, slow beginning made it that much more memorable.

Reflecting on other Super Bowl performances, there are few moments that I can think of with any great amount of clarity. The Jackson/Timberlake "wardrobe malfunction" in 2004 doesn't really count as the memory is linked to the activity at the end as opposed to the performances themselves. I think the 2007 performance by Prince was pretty entertaining, but I understand that many people don't like him or his music all that much - even though his musicianship is hard to be topped by anyone. Some people will say "But what about Paul McCartney in 2005?!??" I understand that people love the music, and Sir Paul did a fine job, but I wouldn't say it was memorable from a "Wow!" perspective.

I'll leave you with what I think is the best performance during the Super Bowl Half-time show since Michael Jackson broke the mold in 1993. It's a superb performance that is very entertaining and incredibly memorable, as U2 rocked the Superdome in 2002 and then brought everyone to tears with their tribute to 9/11 victims:
 

For your reference, here's a complete list of Super Bowl Half-Time Shows.

Three Disciples and a Stooge

A couple of nights ago, according to our nightly bedtime routine for the girls, we were reading the story of when Jesus called the first disciples in Luke 5. You'll recall that Jesus climbs into Peter's boat and tells the men to catch some fish by casting in a certain area. Peter explains the fruitless time they had already spent that morning not catching any fish and yet declares "at your word I will let down the nets." After doing so, they catch so many fish that they need help to haul it in. This event leads to Peter, James and John leaving their boats and becoming the first disciples of Jesus Christ.

At the end of the story, we reviewed it by asking the girls a couple of questions.
One of the questions was "Who decided to stop fishing and follow Jesus?"
Lydia responded "Peter... John... and... Curly!"

 I could immediately hear Curly Howard responding to Jesus request to lower the nets: "Soitenly!"

Photo: Lydia on 04FEB13

They grow up so quickly...

Photo: Lydia on 28JAN13

In a few years this might concern me.
For now though, it makes me very happy.

Sanctification Through Planned Neglect

"The more you study the Word of God, the more it saturates your mind and life. Someone is reported to have asked a concert violinist in New York's Carnegie Hall how she became so skilled. She said it was by "planned neglect". She planned to neglect everything that was not  related to her goal.

Some less important things in your life could stand some planned neglect so that you might give yourself to studying the Word of God."  - John MacArthur, Found: God's Will